Starting over.

I really didn't want to have to start my life over again.  Again being for the third time in 18 months.  But here it is.  

Last Sunday I found the words, "its time for me to go." coming out of my mouth.  I never thought that I would ever say those words or anything else like them.  I have always been the one who would hang on longer than was necessary.   And within 48 hours, I was starting over in a new place.  I am relaxing for the first time in a very long time.  I am not worried about having to prove myself.  I can just be me.  Whatever that is.  And I don't mean that in a way that says that I don't know myself, I do.  Its just that I  change my mind, my mood, my attention, my cloths, hair, and hormones....

For the first time in a long time I am not really worried about what is ahead.  I'll take that as it comes.